{"id":2091,"date":"2016-07-20T00:15:37","date_gmt":"2016-07-20T08:15:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/?p=2091"},"modified":"2016-07-19T08:28:35","modified_gmt":"2016-07-19T16:28:35","slug":"giving-family-financial-advice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/giving-family-financial-advice\/","title":{"rendered":"Giving Family Financial Advice: Should You Do It?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"GivingOver the years my opinion on helping friends and family by dishing out financial advice has completely changed.<\/p>\n

After I straightened out my money situation and felt firsthand how my stress melted away and my confidence grew, I couldn\u2019t help but want to share my newfound knowledge with everyone. The problem seemed to be that despite my efforts nobody wanted to listen.<\/p>\n

Giving family financial advice is one area that can backfire. Here\u2019s what to do instead.<\/p>\n

Do NOT Judge<\/h2>\n

One of the worst ways to go about helping someone is to negatively judge them. This is will only make that person defensive and have even less of a desire to take your advice.<\/p>\n

Accept the fact that you have no control over this person\u2019s actions and judging them will only put a strain on your relationship.<\/p>\n

At the end of the day it can be hard to know someone is setting themselves up for financial ruin. But there\u2019s also more to life than money. If you want to keep your relationship you need to push your judgements aside.<\/p>\n

Only Give Advice if You\u2019re Asked for It<\/h2>\n

There have been many times over the past few years where I didn\u2019t <\/em>bite my tongue when a family member was complaining about all of their debt payments and paycheck to paycheck living.<\/a> I would chime in with a list of suggestions that went in one ear and out the other.<\/p>\n

It can, at times, be hard to bite your tongue \u2013 especially if you hear someone bragging about their six year car loan or maxed out credit cards. But if you aren\u2019t asked for advice don\u2019t give it.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Nobody is going to change until they\u2019re really<\/em> ready to do it and you\u2019re unsolicited advice can come off harshly. Nobody wants to feel belittled. (And you probably don\u2019t want someone you care about to feel belittled by you.)<\/p>\n

If you are asked for financial advice give it from a place of love and try to put yourself in the other person\u2019s position. Encourage rather than shame. And be open about the changes you\u2019ve made and struggles you\u2019ve gone through.<\/p>\n

People prefer to take advice from people who\u2019ve been in a similar situation. If approach your advice-giving in a way that makes you seem superior you\u2019ll diminish your efforts.<\/p>\n

Lead by Example<\/h2>\n

What\u2019s likely is that mostly of your family members will never directly ask you for advice. This is especially true for older relatives that had a part in raising you. (Would you want to take financial advice from your child?)<\/p>\n

Even though you may not be asked for advice you can make a profound effect leading by example.<\/p>\n

If others can see that you\u2019re happy, financially stable and less stressed they\u2019ll be drawn to that. Keep on making good decisions regardless of what others do or say.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t Lend Money<\/h2>\n

Lending money to family member who is in a bad situation seems like a noble thing to do, right? But it can be a HUGE mistake. (See why here<\/a>.)<\/p>\n

If a family member is in desperate need of money but doesn\u2019t have a track record of financial responsibility think twice before handing the money over. Give the money if you can and think that\u2019s appropriate. Otherwise don\u2019t lend money.<\/p>\n

Accept the Fact that You Can\u2019t Do Anything About It<\/h2>\n

At the end of the day, if you want to keep your relationships in tact you\u2019ve got to realize that there\u2019s nothing you can do to improve someone else\u2019s financial situation. Everyone has to make their own choices and you cannot force change in someone else\u2019s life.<\/p>\n

Accept that there\u2019s more to life than money. Continue making the positive improvements to your life but don\u2019t automatically assume that other people want to do the same.<\/p>\n

How do you handle giving financial advice to family members?<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Over the years my opinion on helping friends and family by dishing out financial advice has completely changed. After I straightened out my money situation and felt firsthand how my stress melted away and my confidence grew, I couldn\u2019t help but want to share my newfound knowledge with everyone. The problem seemed to be that […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":2092,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[586,257,305],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2091"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2091"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2091\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2092"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2091"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2091"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cultofmoney.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2091"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}